NORTH KOREA – A HO’S LIFE

Don’t you think the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea feels a bit ho’ed-out by this point?

After more than six decades of being cradled in China’s loving arms where China’s “love” included fighting a war for DPRK’s sovereignty and honor, presenting DPRK with the Chairman’s “Close As Lips & Teeth” status award and engaging the widely-disliked rogue state as a trading partner as well as a financial aid beneficiary, what did all this love do for North Korea? How about an undernourishment rate of 35% [PDF], an infant mortality rate of more than 25 per 1000, and a Gross Domestic Product that doesn’t even place the country in the top 100?

Kim Jong-Un et al. earning the “Crazy Ho” prize for doing ridiculous things with Chinese aid aside, DPRK can’t be this stupid. They HAVE  to realize by now that China finds them sexy because China needs a geopolitical and military buffer from anything that resembles the United States or any of the latter’s friends.

I’m sure North Korea would prefer to be alone, but like many exploited hos, North Korea unfortunately has no loot, making it prone to other nations flush with cash and games. Besides, a North Korea independent of China is simply not in China’s best interests.

It seems obvious DPRK either needs to find a new pimp, be a different kind of ho under new terms or upgrade to Lover status, so why does North Korea choose to be THIS kind of ho?

Why, hypothetically speaking, doesn’t North Korea consider being America’s ho? (Laughing) C’mon, it’s not like DPRK can say, “Nah, because we’re not hos.”

I’ll rap about the American option later…

song currently stuck in my head: “blues a la carte” – wayne shorter